Sunday, November 8, 2009

Lame Excuses I Make

You've got me smoking a pack a day
But I thank you
I haven't been able to finish anything I started.
Until now, until you.

You've got me hitting the hard stuff
But I'm grateful
I've forgotten how much I love Tanqueray gin
Tequila shots, vanilla vodka... Good stuff.

You've got me spouting craploads of filth
But that's okay
I've finally found the words to describe my situation
& I've discovered that I have some pretty good imagination

You've got me crying myself to sleep
But it's alright
It's reassuring that I still have feelings
& I'm finally able to fall asleep.

You've got me walking into walls deliberately
But whatever
I'm a klutz; it's bound to happen anyway
& the physical pain takes away the emotional one

You've got me trying to look pretty in vain
But it's not a complete waste
Now I know that I look like crap in green
& that I can look like a girl if I try

You've got me running back to you in desperation
But now I know
That your beautiful words are hollow & fake
& that nothing's changed, & it never will

You've got me underestimating myself
But I'm not looking back
Now I know that I have issues
& I'm going to face them. Just watch me.

You've got me lying to like there's no tomorrow
To myself & to others
But it's easier to hide behind a smile
Less questions, less pain.

& you've got me writing intentionally sucky poems
Instead of concentrating on the piles of work i have

& I've run out of excuses

(drawing is by me, at the back of my Math notebook :) )


Gadgetgirl said...

Damn. Loved the 8th verse. Aswezome shit. Ahaha. Look at that tag "terrible emo poetry". :D Loved it.

She Who Eats Cookies said...

Thank yoooo! :D

Chavie said...

I don't think it's sucky at all! :/ I loved it too! :D and I <3 the drawing! ;) lol

Sabby said...

Sounds familiar! :)
Good stuff!

riseoftheneophyte said...

Rofl! :P
Was reading the first few verses & honestly thinking, ''Damn, what a celebration!!''
Always the reverse effect for me....

She Who Eats Cookies said...

@Chavie hahaha thankyou! The drawing fit perfectly with this nah? :D

@Sabby aww thanks!

@riseoftheneophyte- yeahh this is pretty ironical. I'm not actually that grateful though :P